What I wish I knew with baby # 1…truths, tips, and ideas

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Looking back over the years since I’ve had my first baby, there have been countless lessons learned, wisdom gained, and knowledge acquired–and I’m still learning.  There have so many times I’ve muttered to myself “I wish I knew that the first time!”, and with some things, wondered why in the world no one ever filled me in beforehand!

So…I’m going to do that for you.  Six babies later, I’m sharing not only some of the truths I’ve learned, but also tips on some baby basics and advice for new moms, and maybe–hopefully– you’ll glean a little something that will help you on your motherhood journey. And while you’re in the thick of it, you’ll know that someone else has been there, and understands.

what I wish I knew with baby #1 | simplykierste.com

You ready? Here we go…what I wish I knew with baby #1! (affiliate links included below)

You will still look pregnant after you have your baby.  Like 4-5 months pregnant.  At least. Unless you are a freak of nature (and I still love you if that’s you–just extremely jealous), you will probably wear your maternity jeans for a month or two after your baby is born, and at the very least, lots of very stretchy and comfy yoga pants.  This came as a big shock to me. I had no idea that that’s how it worked, and I squeezed into the pants I brought to the hospital to wear home.  So, just be prepared. That’s half the battle, right?  Bring your comfiest, stretchiest pants with a waistband that won’t hurt you (especially if you have a c-section, like I did several times). Your stomach will go down over the next weeks, but it takes time.

Just remember—you are a ROCK STAR. You just grew and gave birth to a tiny human, and you’ve earned your stripes, and that stomach.  You are beautiful, and even though you don’t feel it, tell yourself in the mirror at least ten times a day how awesome you are.  If you forget, I will remind you.

Trust your instincts. 

As a new mom, you might be wondering if you have the “mom instincts” to know what to do, and how to do it.  If they just “come”, or if they happen over time.  Actually, it’s a little of both.  You’re the mom, it’s your baby, and with that comes an innate sense of what “feels right”, and what doesn’t.  Listen to it. Trust it.  Don’t be afraid to act on it.

When my oldest was just two weeks old, his umbilical cord was just not looking right.  The whole surrounding belly button area was red and a little inflamed, and even though I had no idea what it was actually supposed to look like, I had a feeling that something wasn’t quite right.  He was also so fussy, I couldn’t get him calmed down, and I decided to take him into the doctor to get it checked out.  I was nervous about it, because I didn’t want the doctor to think I was crazy. If nothing was wrong, I would like really foolish, and it would suddenly be very obvious that I had no idea what I was doing.  In the end, I decided I would much rather go in and look a little silly, then not go in and be worried sick, or have something be really wrong.

When I got to the office, it took only about five minutes before they sent him directly to the PICU of the nearest children’s hospital–we skipped the emergency room, everything. He had a very serious bacterial infection that required a week in the PICU, a PICC line inserted and another week at home on heavy antibiotics. The doctors kept asking me over and over again how I knew, how just a little redness around the belly button clued me in, but I didn’t really have an answer other than I just knew. I didn’t know what was wrong, or that would be that serious, but I’m so glad I trusted those instincts. That has proved to be the case over and over again, with all of my children, in every situation, both small and large.

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About Simply Kierste Design Co.

Kierste is a blogger who shares her love of all things DIY. She is the mother of six, and focuses on simple ideas and projects to make a house a home! When she's not chasing around two sets of twins, a teenager, and a baby, she's working on a project, training for her next race, reading one of her favorite books, or baking something with chocolate in it.

17 thoughts on “What I wish I knew with baby # 1…truths, tips, and ideas

  1. While I was in the hospital after having our first baby, my husband took our car seat to our local fire station, and they told him they couldn’t help him, nor could they direct him to someplace that could help him install it properly. He was so livid! He eventually figured out how to install it himself. So, first, don’t wait until it’s time to bring the baby home to install the car seat, and second, check around before you assume the local fire station can help you.

    1. That’s crazy, Courtney! I guess I just assumed that every fire station/police station participated, because ours always have. And yes, definitely a good idea to do it a few weeks advance, just in case baby comes before you think they will. :)

  2. Regarding bottle feeding breastfed babies. My lactation consultant and pediatrician both told me to wait until the baby was 4 weeks old before offering a bottle to make sure that breastfeeding is established well. Then if you want the baby to continue to take a bottle they should be given at least one a week. My first baby loved the soothie pacifiers and the bottles that came with my breast pump. My second baby we had to try 5 different pacifiers and 4 different bottles to find one he would take. It may take some work and babies definitely have their own preferences.

    1. Yep–every baby is different, and each doctor will give their own opinion that can vary as well. It’s always best to do your research, ask your doctor, and make your decision!! xoxo

    2. All of my babies had a bottle from day 1 and i breastfed AND they had pacifies i like living on the wild side of confusion and ciaos… oh and none of them had any issues with switching it up..and all nursed and latched just fine . i have heard horror stories of moms going insane because they waited too long and can’t leave the house without baby for longer than an hour or 2 and you know i just want to sorta say ” told ya’ so” in an article such as this… in as nice of a way as possible..haha not all professionals really know more than a book tells them.. take it from moms who have been there several times over. professionals…they get paid to say it and they don’t have to deal with the screaming baby on the other end of the bottle. if you wait to give a bottle you are more likely going to have a baby refuse it.. ;)

  3. Hey Kierste!

    I am 11 weeks pregnant and already have everyones opinion flying at me! This is my first one. So I am a bit overwhelmed. I saw your blog on Pinterest. Thank you so much for being so honest. It made me feel so much better about being a mom and doing things my own way. I have always been an independent person and its super hard when people think they should have a say on your pregnancy and your kids. Even books I have read make things so difficult and one sided.

    This helped clear a lot off my chest and mind! We need a lot more mothers and women like you. We just need to support each other instead of being against each other.

    This gave me a piece of mind thank you!


    1. Suzie, CONGRATULATIONS!! I am so excited for you! Motherhood is truly the most wonderful and incredible journey, I’m so happy for you. I’m also so glad that my words could help and give you a little peace of mind. You’ve totally got this! We are definitely all in it together! :) Take care!! xoxo

  4. This is just what I needed to hear! My 8 month old is going thru the 8 month sleep regression. While it could be a lot worse, ithe sleep deprivation has been JUST hard enough for me to give up on our previous sleep training success and now we co-sleep (which is something I told myself I’d never do!!). My advice to new mommies: be flexible!! ?

    1. Oh yes, that’s a great one! Being flexible is what motherhood is all about. :) Good luck with the sleeping stuff–it’s SO hard not getting enough rest, so I’m all about whatever helps make that happen!!! :) xoxo

  5. This is so interesting! My older sister is (so far) the only one in the family who has children, and she is very adamant about breastfeeding ONLY. I have a lot of respect for her and I believe she is one of the most informed people about babies I know, but something has always rung a little off when I thought about how little down-time that leaves the mother….my fiance and I joke about his sleep schedule – he is a TRUE night owl by nature, and the other day I said “That’s fine! You can play video games all night as long as you take the night time feeding shifts!” Realizing this went against the opinion of the only person with baby experience I know, I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I really want my fiance to have that bonding experience with the baby, and honestly I don’t see the harm in bottle feeding if you are also breast feeding, and giving mother’s milk.
    The other aspects of this article are also great! Love the laundry basket in the tub idea! I will be sure to save this page and pull it out when I am finally expecting! Thanks!

    1. And that’s what makes motherhood so great! Really, no one is right or wrong, and going with what you feel is best for you and your baby is the right choice. And if you still want to give breast milk only, but still give a bottle, I have many friends who pump and then freeze the milk. It’s the best of both worlds. :)

      Thanks so much for stopping by, and for commenting! Have a fabulous day!!

  6. Thank you so much for the suggestion of the Boba baby carrier. I had been expecting to fork out for an expensive carrier and separate newborn insert. But the Boba fits what I want for a much better price – suitable from newborn toddler , wide leg position and suitable for front and back use. About to order one right now!

  7. Great tips and truths!!! I’m so glad pinterest suggest this, my baby is now 4 months old and even thought I wish I would’ve read it before it’s still so helpful :)
    At first I was sad to learn there is such a thing like disposable sippy cups but then I read you can also reuse them phew! Haha

    1. Oh, yes–you can definitely re-use disposable sippy cups! You just don’t care as much if they get lost or ruined, because they’re so cheap! :) 4 months old—I love love that age! Enjoy every little minute!! xoxo

  8. Love these tips! I’m on baby #2 here. My first baby was easier to teach to fall asleep on his own. My little girl has been a much fussier baby, so we’ve used any tricks to get her to sleep. Now that we’ve adjusted some, I’m ready for more structure. About what age did you start allowing them to figure out how to fall asleep on their own? I know all babies are different and all momma hearts are different.

    1. Babies are funny that way…they each come a little differently! As soon as you get it down one way, the next baby changes things up. :) We started pretty early with helping them learn to fall asleep on their own–by 6 weeks usually. When I knew they were fed, changed, loved on, and snuggled, I put them down in their crib for bed. Some babies learned right away, and others it took a a week or two to figure it out. Every mom has their threshold of how long they will let their babies cry, and like you said so beautifully, all momma’s hearts are different. I think consistency is key–and whether you start with a little bit of time and increase it, or stay with the same amount of time, doing it over and over until they learn is what will teach them. Thankfully, my babies were all really good sleepers, and we never had many issues, and I don’t know how that happened!! Congrats on baby #2….babies are the BEST!!! xoxo

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